Tag: masturbate

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arrested Featured

HIV Infected Priest Arrested For Solicitating Sexual Act

A 69-year-old Catholic priest was arrested in a Cleveland park after offering a ranger $50 for a sexual act, police said.

James McGonegal exposed himself to an off-duty Metropark ranger last week and then proceeded to pleasure himself while seated in his SUV on park grounds, police reported.

Because he is HIV-positive, he was charged with a felony count of solicitation after testing positive for HIV, as well as public indecency.

He was a pastor at St. Ignatius of Antioch Church, according to several local reports.

He was released on bond.

He solicited an off-duty ranger wearing civilian and said he was “cruising,” police said. The ranger, who was not part of a sting operation, asked the man what he meant by that.

McGonegal said he needed help to “get off,” according to officers. Sex aides were found in his vehicle.

Then the priest showed the ranger his penis and began masturbating, police said.

He was arrested without incident.

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Abortions Featured Politics

Republican Representative Said Fetuses Masturbate, So Abortions Should End

I bet you didn’t know that masturbation began before birth. It’s okay, like you, I didn’t know this either. But thanks to the wonderful information provided by our friendly Republicans – you know, the same folks who taught us about legitimate rape and the ability of the woman’s body to “shut that whole thing down” if pregnancy occurs from illegitimate rape – we now know that fetuses, as early as 15 weeks old, pleasure themselves by masturbating.

This piece of info is brought to us compliments of Texas Republican Congressman Michael Burgess, who used the masturbation theory as a reason to push a bill outlawing abortions before 20 weeks. According to Mr. Burgess, if a 15 weeks fetus could feel pleasure from… pleasuring himself, then he could also feel the pain of an abortion.

The congressman explains;

“There is no question in my mind that a baby at 20-weeks after conception can feel pain. The fact of the matter is, I argue with the chairman because I thought the date was far too late. We should be setting this at 15-weeks, 16-weeks,” said the former OB/GYN during the House Rules Committee debate on the “Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act.”

“Watch a sonogram of a 15-week baby, and they have movements that are purposeful,” he continued. “They stroke their face. If they’re a male baby, they may have their hand between their legs. If they feel pleasure, why is it so hard to believe that they could feel pain?”

He has no doubt in his mind that this is so, so women must now give up their right to choose what’s best for their own health. Go Republicans!

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Politics

Former Mayor Charged – Masturbating At 90 Miles per Hour

Question: If you masturbate at 90 Miles an hour, do you cum arrive really fast?

William Blakely, former Vice-Mayor of Mount Carmel, Tennessee, was accused in court yesterday of having a long-running streak of reckless driving incidents that stem from a penchant for sticking his genitals out of the window and masturbating in the direction of passing female motorists.

Three women appeared in a Kingsport court yesterday to submit testimony about their personal interactions with Blakely.

“At over 90 miles per hour, he had his penis out [the window]. He was masturbating,” said one victim. “[A]nd that’s when it got really, really bad.”

All three testimonies followed a similar pattern: Blakely would wave and honk at the female driver in an attempt to get her attention, then he would expose his chest and ask her to “please, please” do the same.

According to Detective Terry Christian, it was thanks to one of the three women who wrote his license plate number down that Blakely was finally being brought to justice after years of harassment.

Per Christian, over the course of “three or four years,” his department received “dozens of phone calls” from victims aged 16 to 65.

Blakely has been charged with indecent exposure, reckless endangerment, and attempt to commit aggravated assault.

A Grand Jury court date, where additional cases involving Blakely will be presented, has been scheduled for June 14th

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